twenty6.

Hi. I am 26. I am single. No, I am not a failure.

If you find yourself in the same place do you ever feel like that is how you need to identify yourself?

At the holidays especially there seems to be added pressure for single people to be in a serious relationship. I think this needs to change. First off, because singleness is to be preferred over marriage (as per Jesus and Paul the apostle... They even basically say that marriage is for the weak... but I am not going to get into that tonight!). Second reason, God is getting more glory from my being single than if I was married right now. Do you want to know how I know this is true? Because I am single. He is omnipotent, all-powerful. Do you really think He would let me (and you) be in this situation if it was giving Him less glory than something else that He had the power to make happen? I could be married right now. But by God's grace He has saved me from those potentially hazardous situations that I am confident would have brought Him way less glory. I also could have a baby right now. But by God's great grace He has prohibited that from happening. He has enabled me to remain single for the time being for a purpose that is somewhat unknown to me. But that is okay with me. I don't care if I ever get married or not. Marriage is not my life's purpose! God's glory and His kingdom expanded are my purpose. I fully trust He will work out whatever situation is best for me to produce the most fruit in those two areas at every age of my life.

I am 26 and I am single but I am not going to waste this year. The past two years have brought two situations with men that I thought were leading to marriage. One was a bad situation that I entered into without God's consent that I never should have gotten myself into and He had to rescue me from. The other was a great situation that God put me into with a godly man that God also took me out of. Neither of these two were the man for me. And that is ok! This year, I honestly hope and pray I can not find a man to have a story with. As a teenager I used to pray that only one man would ever be interested in me so I never had to be confused or deal with a broken heart. Now that I have dealt with both situations I know God has a purpose for them. I can relate better to so many more women and hopefully encourage others not to enter into the situations I did. It might sound strange but I do not regret either situation. It would be easy for me to look forward to this year and say, who is going to be the guy for my 26th year. But I don't want that. I want to commit this year to the Man who holds my heart, or should. I want Jesus to get all of me. Since these past two guys made me seriously consider and desire marriage I want to make sure I do not just consider marriage a goal. I am raising the bar because of them (more the second guy than the first!) and I am going to make sure that my heart is so close to Jesus' that any guy will have to go to Him to find mine. And in the meantime I am going to encourage as many women as I can who are in, have been in or could in the future be in the same situations I have been through these past two years. So that said, my heart is off the market. It is taken. Sorry guys but it is not up to me anymore. If you want it, you'll know where to go!

I have had a great couple of days with my extended family. These few days have enabled me to be removed from the monotony of my daily life and reminded me that I am loved by some amazing people. I am also reminded that if I don't have a family of my own someday that is ok because I could have had that right now with the wrong guy and God had to do some crazy things to stop it from happening. I would much rather be single where I am right now than with someone who isn't God's best for me. And if God's best for me is only Him, He will give me the grace and strength to live that out and use my time wisely.

So while God perfects me and I work out my sanctification, I trust that He will show me the purpose of all His dealings in my life which continually remind me that people let me down but He remains constant, is always looking out for my well-being, loves me with a sacrificial love, gives me grace upon grace, shows mercy to my adulteress heart, is faithful in my unfaithfulness, and ultimately is all-powerful, all-knowing and seeking His glory - which is the purpose of my existence. Who could go wrong remembering that?